She was not given what she asked for and threw a tantrum, which stressed her mother out. The mother wanted to teach her that she should not behave like that, she scolded her, hit her and punished her. Her mother did not let her express her anger and it was enough for her not to forget that she could not throw tantrums.
But she took it as if she had no right to get angry…
From then on she tried to please her mother and all the adults and did not know how to put bounderies on what they asked of her.
As an adult, Katheleen at night, when she had nothing left to do, her mind tormented her and to calm her mind, she overated. She was more than 25 pounds overweight.
Katheleen tried several ways to lose weight, but she did not know how to do it. She was unsuccessful. She would not stop eating when she was alone with her mind.
One day a friend invited her to a class on how to express emotions. When Kathleen came to class, she was given a bataca and a pillow and was told to hit the pillow with the bataca when she felt angry and to shake her body when she felt sad.
All the students in the class were hitting the pillow except Kathleen. So the teacher came and asked her why she wasn't hitting the pillow, to which Kathleen replied that she didn't feel angry. The teacher confirmed that she had to hit the pillow. Then Kathleen started hitting the pillow; after a few minutes, Kathleen started hitting it very hard, bringing out a rage that she didn't know she had.
This is how Kathleen realized that her mother prevented her from expressing her anger that time when she threw a tantrum and that traumatized her until that day. After that, Kathleen began to express her emotions and heal from her trauma.
Kathleen stopped overeatin when she was alone and lost 25 pounds without any effort…
What traumas do you carry? How do you deal with stress? How do you express your emotions? Are your emotions healthy? Are you self-destructing? What bad habits do you practice that are preventing you from unleashing your potential?
Maybe that extra weight you carry is because you feel safe by not being attractive. You hide from a predator that stalked you when you were a child.
Or maybe you weatness a very bad accident that you can't get over and you keep your mind busy by eating.
Or maybe when you fight with your partner you decide to hide in alcohol like your mother or father did when they fought.
Healing your emotions and traumas
Don't let your past be part of your present. Start by accepting that you need help and that you carry traumas that you have not been able to overcome. There are several ways to overcome your trauma and you can get a lot of help from people who have gone through something similar.
Or if you think you don't carry any trauma, but you can’t lose weight or improve your life, be open to learning how to improve yourself as a human being and stay healthy.
Kathleen, for example, didn't know she was dealing with that trauma until her friend invited her to a class about emotional expression.
At the end of Kathleen Fors' interview, she gives us a message:
Your emotional health is the most important thing. Once your emotional health improves, everything improves in your life…
And I couldn't disagree. Healing your emotions and traumas for live better life.
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