I Learned How To Be Happy From A Homeless Man
- Sandro Torres
- Apr 28
- 4 min read
One of the habits that I practice routinely is to try my best to understand all people, that includes homeless people.
There are several homeless people in the area where I live and most of them are friendly and even respectful. Many of them are shy and I imagine they are shy because they are misunderstood by society and they are also judged. Many people think they understand them and that they live like that because they are lazy.
Although I am not against how they live, I am not in favor of it either.
In the end that is their life and they decide how to live...
For two years I have seen a homeless man that I really like and I have spent those two years trying to say hello to him and want to talk to him and until recently he avoided me. Finally he started to say hello to me with shame. I think he says hello to me with shame because he thinks I am going to scold him. Usually he sees me with my family, walking with my dogs, or driving my car.
Lately Levonde (that's the homeless’ name and I don't know how to spell his name) visits the cafeteria that I also go to. I like to greet him, give him a hug and ask him how he is and I invite him to something from the cafeteria. He, a little embarrassed, asks me for an American coffee. I insist on inviting him something else and he confirms in a respectful but firm way that he only wants coffee.
Finally, on the last day that I saw him, I asked him what his aspirations were and he answered that nature. Then I was a little more specific in the question and asked him if he had any goals or objectives. To which he answered again that nature and photos of it.
When he answered these questions I noticed that he was very sincere…
I have seen him study many times. Well, at least he tells me that he is studying. I have seen his notebook and the only thing on it are scratches that don't make sense to me.
I have read in psychology books that what we write, draw or put on paper is what we have in our mind. That makes me think that Levonde has no aspirations and his life at the moment. I am not saying that this is good or bad.
I am just saying that Lavonde thinks differently than many of us…
When I got home, I started talking to my wife and told her that Lavonde is happy the way he lives. Even though he is homeless, he smells good. That means that he cleans himself and possibly takes care of his basic needs. But he has no ambitions. If someone stops in front of him with a Ferrari or a Honda, it is the same for him. Levonde just lives. He does not want a family, a job, to travel, to play sports, to prove that he is the best at something. He just lives.
With this I explained to her that he is happy like a rabbit or squirrel...
Squirrels and rabbits just live. They don't care about anything. They just live, they look for their food and they don't care how the day goes. They don't think about having a bigger house, a more luxurious hole, or transportation. They just live.
When we were talking about this, my wife and I were in the dining room with the heater on. Then she asked me how it could be? If she went out at that moment she would be unhappy outside because of the cold. To which I answered yes, because she already knew inside. If she didn't know inside, she would be happy outside and she would look for a way to adapt. So what she needed was to accept reality. Jisela was left thinking.
I continued explaining that Levonde is happier than many rich people who have more than him…
Let's say that there are two types of rich people. He who thinks like Levonde, but gives his best to be financially better off and the rich man who works to earn more and get more because he thinks that acquisitions are his happiness.
The rich man who knows that life is just life, his Ferrari, his house in Miami and everything he has obtained does not make him happy. He knows that if at some point he loses everything, he will continue to be happy. He only lives the moment like Levonde with what he has.
However, the other rich man lives in fear of losing what he has and when he loses it he cannot accept reality and he gets angry, depressed and let the loss affect him emotionally.
Well, Jisela concludes that in reality happiness is internal and does not depend on the outside…
Then she began to talk about our daughter, Arlet. She told me that she brings us happiness. I told her yes, but that our daughter was not our happiness. I told her that she (Jisela) was happy before she had Arlet and now that she has Arlet she is also happy. Now you know Arlet and she is a part of you, but before you didn't know her and you were happy too.
The problem is when we don't accept the reality of the present we live in...
With this I'm not saying that it's easy to accept our losses when we are emotionally attached to them, for example our daughter, Arlet. By obtaining something emotional we learn to love and it makes us feel good, but we also have to accept the suffering that comes with it and accept the present.
Levonde knows that, I don't know if consciously or unconsciously, but that's an advantage that many of us don't have…
The conclusion of the talk was that we have to live giving everything to ourselves enjoying the moment and those we love because we don't know if tomorrow will have the same conditions. And if the conditions change, accept them as they are. We have to live as Lavonde lives. He lives in the moment and that makes him happy.
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